My Suicide Note

I look down at this peice of paper
Who are you, what are your goals?
I'm a girl dressed in black, I have no goals
Honestly that's all I am, all I know.

Everyone knows who they are
Who they're going to be
The thought of agony and displacment
Has never occured in their minds.

If you feel lost in this world
This poem is for you
Life is a twisted game we all play
Some live through it, some die trying.

If I could pick what I looked like
Or the blueprint of my destiny
I would be happy, beautiful
But I'm not nor will I ever be.

Maybe I cut my wrists to relieve my pain
Is that such a bad thing?
My family says it's stupid
I say it's my own classification.

The love I've held for others has disapeared
It's been replaced with angry tears
Don't think I hold feelings for people
I don't have sympathy for them anymore.

Everyone is an example of the seven sins
Proud, jealous, violent, whiny, greedy, honry
We're all programed the same
So why is everyone labeled different?

Look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself
What kind of person am I?
Most of you will lie and say the opposite answer
But what are you hinding from, your innerself?

Most often than not
You'll hear about a murder on the news
You think 'awe how sad' and flip the channel
But have you ever thought about that victims life?

Don't tell me I'm something I'm not
Cause i'll do everything just to prove you wrong
I'm not your little sterotype that you labeled
I'm the kind of person that stands out of the crowd.

Happy, joyfull, pleasant
That's what everyone is
Broken, disturbed, angry
This is what I am.

I have no soul only debris inside my bones
Let me lash out my sarrow
Rip off my sweater and see
The cuts that feed me inside.

I'm so sick of this sadness
Nothing will ever make it go away
Look into my eyes and see darkness
My tears are invisible to everyone expect me.

The silence is in black and white
The apocolypse is above us and you can feel it
I'll be dead before the sun rises
You'll carry on just like before you met me.

Let this be my suicide note
Carry on until your old and grey
Become famous and show your talent
Don't shed tears for my misfortune.

I love you the most in this world
But let me take these pills
And cut out my heart, let me
Drink a bottle of jack and let go of my pain.

I'll wait for you after I'm gone
But you have to live your year
Don't worry you'll be great
I hate to leave like this,

But maybe it's fate
Goodbye Jonathan Elbaz
My only one true friend
Carry on until the end.